I currently have two fashion collections designed one being based off the Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland and another being about Autistic bullying. The Queen of Hearts speaks to me, because what if she was a good person like me, pushed into traumatic situation one after the other and finally breaks, but when she couldn’t fight no more, she had no support or no will to keep fighting so she turns to the dark side.
I feel like at that moment in time it was my make or break it time. I could have gone one of two ways, well technically three, the third being letting that meltdown take me where it could have gone. I still choose to see the light in the world despite how much darkness has happened to me.
Will I always have the vivid dreams that come with the PTSD? Yes. But I have hope that as I get stronger, I am more able to deal with it. Like the ball stays the same size, but the glass gets bigger and stronger so it will not break. I am not fighting though.
I decided to accept who I am. When I was a little girl I would spend hours upon hours on the weekend crafting, going to crafting classes and taking any moment I could to soak it in. However, as I got older people forced me to be who I was not because it wouldn’t support a lifestyle and I ended up defeated, but I am not fighting that anymore. I have a vision and I want to bring it to life.
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